CANCER Horoscope for today: “Don’t be afraid to be picky about the people with whom you are spending time. So much can be established with like-minded individuals. Put time aside to have a little fun.”
…according to horoscope.com. I mean, I am cool with the whole astrology thing, but who comes up with this shit? Do people sit at their computers from 9 to 5 and write random shit so that thousands of lost souls can find a random sentence or two about how to lead their lives for the next twenty-four hours? …Not that I’m a lost soul, ’cause I’m not. I just…you know…check my horoscope on occasion.
So it tells me I shouldn’t be afraid to be picky about the people I spend time with. Okay, so tell me something new. I am picky ’bout who I even so much as LOOK at on a daily basis. Telling me this now makes this statement a few years too late. Really, I think the entire horoscope is shitty. And fun? What makes you think I even have TIME for fun?! Tell me that after 20 credits, a job, two e-board positions and a jacked-up social life that needs some serious revision. Then maybe you’ll see how much time I have left for “fun”.
Let’s look at another horoscope, compliments of horoscopes.com:
“Take time for both. Today you’ll have dual needs. On one hand, you’ll want to take part in social activities. And at the same time, you’ll need some time alone. Fortunately, you can and should do both! Today plan time with others, and also try to find someplace quiet where you can spend an hour alone.”
…NO, I do NOT want to take part in social activities! In fact, I do all I can in order to avoid them! Now, the “some time alone part” is correct…every damn day. I would die without my alone time. So once again, find something more constructive to say rather than telling me something that applies to every day of my life. How about writing something that actually is specific to my Wednesday, November 30th? *sigh*. Astrology-infested idiots. And plan time with whom, exactly? Who on earth would I want to spend time with at this damn university? The people here fall into one of three categories. Those who scare me, those who annoy me, and those who I don’t pay attention to because I’m sure they ain’t worth my time anydamnway.
Thus, I conclude this entry with my affirmation that writers of horoscopes are full of shit. And for those of you who are currently mentally screaming at me with something that resembles “No! But they are accurate! I check mine all the time!” …Then your dumbass either stretched their words in order for it to fit your pathetic existence, or it was merely a COINCIDENCE.
Sorry to burst your bubble. But such is life.

Astrology is one of the biggest pieces of BULLSHIT ever created. I can read you a horoscope for your sign, then I can read you a horoscope for another sign (and not tell you of course) and you’d believe it. I don’t even know why it’s called AstrolOGY, because it sure as hell isn’t a science. If you believe in this stuff, then there is a bridge in Brooklyn I’d love to sell you.
I gave up on horoscopes after all of the bullshit predictions in YM never came true during high school. I’m still a cancer through and through, but that’s as far as I take it.
hah tonite on south park stan was explaining how TV psychics just do what horoscopes do and generalize enough to find somebody that will agree with their reading. He even did a demonstration with a random lady on the street and drew such a crowd that they gave him his own show! I swear south park has a lot more credible social commentary than people like to believe.